One thing off the top – it takes longer to bounce back. Ho. Lee. Crap.
Gone are the days where I can have an incredible surf or bodysurf session where I bounce off the sand bars repeatedly, get closed out in the shore-break, or sit out on the board taking wave after wave until the sun sets. Gone are the days of going to a show and wrecking myself in the mosh pit all night then waking up ready to run a 10K. Gone are the days that seemed not so long ago where walking through Thailand for 6 hours then going out drinking and eating with the rest of the crew wouldn’t have me heaving any food I introduce into my system for the next 2 days while I soak my feet and legs in hot salted water.
Not like I’ve ever done the last one.
So recently I went to address some of the aches and pains that have been haunting me. I made a commitment – or was actually suggested to me – during my last jaunt down to my Shipibo friends for some expansive ceremony. The one I am referring to is the one where I am to take a long serious look at my physical structure and habits about how I treat my temple and rebuild it to its full glory.
Or bodies are our Temples, and the gateway to true ecstasy and awakening. I remember reading in the series Life and Teaching of the Masters of the Far East that we should live “right within our temples” and that Divine resides and abides in our body. It is truly the only place we ever have to live, the only one we have been given, and is the repository of our soul.
When I had my ceremony, I realized that although I had appreciated my body to a certain extent, I had some arduous work to do. As Joan Rivers once said “My body is a temple that needs some serious redecorating.”
I began to take stock – I am way above what I should weigh for my height and have been there for decades. Somehow I made it through boot camp at 32 and Officer School right before my 34th birthday, and have never failed a physical readiness test. I had a lingering meniscus issue with one leg, and a lingering shoulder issue on the opposing side. Never could run after the first knee scope, and that bothers me. Tingling in the right hand, neck issues with bulged discs, and various other things that have given me the excuse to sit on my ass after work and dinner watching streaming shows until its time to go to bed.
Well the three letter demon (ego) is losing out on this one.
So when I was in the ceremony, this was all easier. I took this grand look at myself while standing in my etheric energetic glory of a golden-white illuminated body consciousness and thought, “This will be good. And this will be done. Easy.” You know, when you’re in that plane things are real clear, but also you are totally aware that when you step down from that platform and assume this density again – WHAM!!! the “My Lord this sucks” and “What the heck was I thinking” thoughts stream faster than Netflix. And I knew that it would be painful, long, drawn out, and totally be worth it.
And I made the appointments with the orthopedic surgeon when I got back. Yep, he went in and scoped my knee first and 2 weeks later did my shoulder.
And I – like a total dumb… – thought it would be easy peasy. Well… let me tell you. WE DON’T BOUNCE BACK THAT DAMN QUICKLY ANYMORE!!!
Yep, the body wanted to start bringing it all to the surface. After the surgeries, somehow (someone seriously tell me how this is possible) I managed to get a hernia and – with my wonderful limited walking – barely be able to sit and walk. Then, to top it all off I have been having night sweats and low energy so they searched me for infections. And I am not talking a light sprinkling sweat. No. We are talking either “wake the wife up and change the damn sheets and pillow cases” or “bring out 3 towels to try to soak it up while you sleep” sweating.
And on top of that, the shuffle. Oh. My God. It’s like I am a damn zombie. I have that old-man slow “I’ll get there eventually” shuffle going on and its pissing me the heck off! I will get there though.
See the thing that I realized is that the work on the body can always be done. And all of this is that crappy muck from the surface that is being scraped off. In one area. The body. The Temple of the Soul. I anxiously await the day that my energy is back, my leg is stable, and my arm can handle swimming a mile again. It will come. But with decision, comes natural shifts as well.
I knew that the shift in focus to the body was another thing that I had to pull the ego monkey mind out of and allow things to show up in their own way. I noticed – probably a week ag0 – that suddenly coffee was making my stomach churn and my head ache. So I decided it was time to stop. And *snap* I was just done and haven’t thought of my second favorite beverage since. Another thing was that I was suddenly craving more fruits and veggies. That the desire for carnitas, chorizo, steak was just not there. I have been noticing these things, and just appreciate them for what they are. I choose not to hold on to that, because why jinx it with some ego statement? At least inside of me.
Inside my temple. Where the Highest Me speaks and lives.
And makes the changes.
My ass just needs to allow and stay the hell out of the way.